


Reaching Out To You

by baekiewiththegoodhair



Category: GOT7
Genre: Angst, M/M, Minor Im Jaebum | JB/Mark Tuan, Minor Kunpimook Bhuwakul | BamBam/Kim Yugyeom, Tags May Change, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:55:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24494623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baekiewiththegoodhair/pseuds/baekiewiththegoodhair
Summary: It all doesn’t seem to matter.It doesn’t matter how Mark’s heart aches every time Jackson smiles at him so brightly.It doesn’t matter that Mark's ears and cheeks turn red, and his heart beats just a little bit faster when Jackson cuddles up on the couch next to him.It doesn’t matter because he is fine being Jackson’s best friend.He’s fine as long as he’s by Jackson’s side.
Relationships: Mark Tuan/Jackson Wang
Comments: 28
Kudos: 73





	1. No Expectations

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter hasn’t been proofread yet, so please excuse any grammatical errors! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! Please comment and let me know what you think!
> 
> P.S: All thoughts are written in italics between ‘__’

It all doesn’t seem to matter. 

It doesn’t matter how Mark’s heart aches every time Jackson smiles at him so brightly. 

It doesn’t matter that Mark's ears and cheeks turn red, and his heart beats just a little bit faster when Jackson cuddles up on the couch next to him. 

It doesn’t matter that every time Mark has more than 2 shots of any alcohol, all he can think about doing is taking the Chinese man’s hand and letting his defenses down; letting him know just how much Mark thinks about him, how much Mark cares about him, how there is nowhere Mark would rather be than in his arms.

Letting him know how much Mark loves him. 

‘ _But it doesn’t matter._ ’ Mark smiles, looking over to where Jackson was teasing Yugyeom in the kitchen of Bambam’s apartment, lightheartedly making fun of the way the younger pronounced ketchup. 

It doesn’t matter because he is fine being Jackson’s best friend. 

He’s fine as long as he’s by Jackson’s side. 

“You should really work on quieting down your thoughts, you know.” Jinyoung says, settling down next to him on the couch.

Mark turns to him and prays that he’s feigning his confusion well enough to trick Jinyoung, “What?”.

But Jinyoung knows him too well. 

And Mark hates that. 

Jinyoung simply smiles at Mark’s miserable attempt and turns to look towards Jackson as well. 

“You probably the person who matters the most to him too, you know.”

Mark stays quiet and tries to ignore the fluttering in his stomach at the other’s words, choosing to look down at the hoodie he was wearing.

“I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

The fluttering immediately stopped. 

Mark bites into his bottom lip. He knows Jackson is straight, obvious from the long list of girls he had dated over the years Mark has known him. Although no girl ever lasted more than a month or two, Jackson would start every relationship optimistically, declaring how he thinks that this girl may be ‘The One’ for him (breaking Mark’s heart just a little bit, every time he said that). But every time the initial excitement of the new relationship faded away, so did Jackson’s interest in the girl. Most of his relationships usually ended with Jackson simply saying, “I don’t think this is working.”

Almost as if hearing his thoughts, Jinyoung pulls Mark towards him. Resting Mark’s head in the crook of his neck and gently playing with his hair. 

“Shh, it’s too loud up in this head of yours,” Jinyoung whispers into Mark’s hair.

Mark finally lets out a chuckle and lets Jinyoung continue to hold him, enjoying how the warmth of the embrace almost quietens his thoughts a little.

“Can you both stop being gross and scoot over,” Bambam interjected, coming out of his bedroom and sitting down next to Jinyoung, causing the older two to let go of their embrace. 

“Wow, that’s rich coming from you, considering what I caught Yugyeom and you doing on this very couch less than an hour ago.” Jinyoung responds.

Yugyeom turned a deep shade of red when Jackson squealed loudly, happy to tease the younger over yet another thing.

Bambam hid his face in his hands, “I swear I need to change the lock password of this apartment, you guys come over too often.” 

Mark and Youngjae, who was currently seated on the floor in front of the TV, giggled at the way their friends were bickering. 

Jinyoung just grinned sheepishly and pulled Bambam into a headlock, “It’s okay Bam-ah. You have needs, we understand.” scruffing the top of Bambam’s head to which Bambam only retorted with a weak “Y ou’re messing up my hairrr. ”

“At least you two aren’t like Jackson Wang here,” Jinyoung continued, letting go of a whiny Bambam and sending a side-eye glare in Jackson’s direction, who was now making his way over to join the others in the living room, with a still red-faced Yugyeom following behind him. 

Mark felt Jackson settle in on his other side, allowing the man to wrap an arm around his waist and pulling the smaller boy into him, securing Mark’s back against his chest. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jackson pouted, his chin dropping onto Mark’s shoulder. 

“Oh, nothing much, just a reference to the long list of past lovers you have. I swear to god if you keep up at this rate, you are going to come across an STD soon enough.”

“Yah Park Jinyoung!” Jackson exclaimed, clearly a little surprised by Jinyoung’s forwardness “The list isn’t  that  long and I’ll have you know, every one of those girls played a very big part in my personal development.”

“Sure.” Jinyoung rolled his eyes.

“What’s up his ass today?”

Mark felt Jackson’s hot breath against the skin of his ear. Shivers ran down his spine,just at the thought of Jackson’s lips being so close to him. 

Mark bit his lip instead focused on tracing his fingertips along the veins on Jackson’s muscular arms, before he shrugged and murmured , “Don’t know.”

“I’m going to go get some coffee from the cafe downstairs,” Jinyoung declared to the room, getting up from his spot on the couch, “Mark, come with me?”

“But Yien and I are cuddling.” Jackson tightened his arms around Mark. 

‘I am actually going to die.’  Mark thought, his heart beating at a record breaking rate.

“Go cuddle with your new girlfriend.” Jinyoung grabbed Mark’s arm and pulled him out of Jackson’s arm.

Every nerve in Mark’s body cried, missing Jackson’s touch and urging Mark to find his way back to him. 

‘ _Wait, new gir-‘_

“You have a new girlfriend hyung?” Yugyeom asked from his spot on floor.

“She isn’t my ‘girlfriend’ yet, but yeah I’m seeing someone. I was going to tell you guys later, but Jinyoung saw me with her earlier, so yeah.” He shrugged and took his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it. 

“Do you like her?” Mark asked, trying his best to maintain a nonchalant tone. 

Jinyoung’s hand loosened from Mark’s forearm and slid down to his hand, holding it and giving him a comforting squeeze.

“I think so,” Jackson nodded, eyes still fixed on his phone, “She’s really great, and who knows? Maybe she could be t-“

“The one. Yeah you always so that.” Mark gave a dry laugh. 

“That’s so true!! You do ALWAYS say that hyung!” Yugyeom laughed out pointing at Jackson. 

“Hey! She’s different okay?”

“Aren’t they all in the beginning?” Bambam snorted. 

“Yah! Show some respect to your hyung, you brat.” Jackson finally tore his eyes away from the screen and punched Bambam’s arm.

Jinyoung gave Mark’s hand another squeeze, “We”re going to get going, we’ll be back later.” Jinyoung said, dragging Mark with him to the door. 

“Could you get me an iced chocolate?” Yugyeom called.

“No.” Jinyoung closed he door after him. 

“Are you okay?”

Mark snapped out of his daze, “huh? Yeah, don’t worry I’m fine.” 

“I’m sorry you found out like that, but he was holding you like that and ... I don’t know, I just felt like you should know.”

“Relax Jinyoungie, I know he’s straight, it’s not like I have any expectations.” Mark gave him a painful smile, trying so hard to not cry, “Should we go get some coffee?”

Jinyoung eyed him, still looking a little concerned, “You sure?”

Mark holds Jinyoung’s hand again, “Yup! I desperately need something sweet right now.”

“What do you want to get?” Jinyoung asked once they got inside the coffee shop and stood in line to place their order.

“Hmm, maybe a hot chocolate? And a brownie? And an Iced Chocolate for Yugyeom.”

Jinyoung rolled his eyes, “You spoil him.”

Mark cracked a smile and was going to retort when a voice cut him. 

“Jinyoung-ah?” 

Jinyoung turned around and widened his eyes in surprise, “Jaebeom hyung?”

This ‘Jaebeom’ guy was standing tall beside Jinyoung, with his coffee in his hand, smiling at them, “It’s been a while, how have you been?” 

‘ _He has a nice smile_ ’  Mark thought, more than glad to have his thoughts distracted by this stranger, as he saw the exchange between the two. 

“Yeah it has,” Jinyoung replied warmly, it was clear that Jaebeom was someone Jinyoung was fond of, “School has been really hectic lately, but you already know that, you did all this last year.”

“True true, senior year is far less hectic though, so push through it yeah?” Jaebeom nodded, and pocketed his free hand into his leather jacket’s pocket, and shoots a glance towards Mark.

Jinyoung widens his eyes, “Oh! Mark this is Lim Jaebeom, he’s my senior in the Economics department. Jaebeom hyung, this is my best friend Mark Tuan, he’s a junior too, but but he’s in the Philosophy department.”

“Hi Mark.” Jaebeom smiled at him and offered his hand.

Mark smiled politely back and shook his hand, “Hello Jaebeom hyung.” He added. 

“Hyung? You aren’t Korean, are you?” Jaebeom asked. 

Mark shook his head, “No, Taiwanese American, why?”

Jaebeom nodded, “So, don’t feel obligated to call me ‘hyung’.”

“Ohh? Can I have that privilege too Jaebeom?” Jinyoung asked cheekily.

“Don’t push it Jinyoung.” Jaebeom poked Jinyoung’s cheek. Jinyoung pouted. 

“So, Philosophy huh? The subject has always intrigued me.” Jaebeom continued.

“Really?” Mark smiled again, this time more genuine, “I think it’s terrible.” 

“You do?” Jaebeom was clearly surprised, “Then why choose it as your major?”

“I love it, but it’s so heavy, I swear I leave every class with a headache.”

Jaebeom chuckled, “Cute.” 

Mark blushed at Jaebeom’ reaction and Jinyoung raised his eyebrow. But Jaebeom didn’t pay much attention and went on, “Anyway, I have to get going,” he said, “It was nice to meet you Mark.”

“You too Jaebeom.” Mark replied, his cheeks still dusted pink.

“I’ll see you around Jinyoung-ah.” Jaebeom ruffled the younger hair and turned around to leave. 

When Jaebeom walked away, “Cute huh?” Jinyoung teased. 

“Shut u-“

“Mark!” Jaebeom called out before pulling on the glass door of the cafe, “I part-time in a record store downtown, you should come by sometime!” 

Mark could feel everyone in the coffee shop’s eyes on him, his fading blush, now becoming blazing red, he quickly nodded, “Okay.” 

Jaebeom smirked, “See you.” 

  
  



	2. Neon Lights And Forced Smiles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn’t understanding why he agreed to be in this situation in the first place. But he had never been able to say no to Jackson.

Mark was spending his afternoon being lazy, surfing YouTube for what was probably the 14th time that hour, when there was banging on his bedroom door.

‘ _What the fuck._ ’ 

Mark rose cautiously from his bed. He lived alone so this meant that someone has already entered his house. He made brief eye contact with the golf set that was collecting dust in the corner of his room. Should he grab a club for protection?

The banging got louder, “Yien!! Open up!”

Mark could recognize that voice instinctually. 

“Gaga?”

Mark hurried to open the door, ”What are you doing here?”

“I can’t visit my best friend?”

“How did you enter my house Jackson?”

“How many times have I told you not to keep your spare key under the door mat?”

“Okay so you were shameless enough to enter my house without my knowledge, but you drew the line at entering my bedroom?” Mark tried his best to sound annoyed at the boy.

“Hey, I didn’t know if you had a guy in here with you.” Jackson replied, looking over Mark’s shoulder and towards the bed, to see just an open laptop, “Guess not.”

Mark rolled his eyes, and moved back towards the bed, allowing Jackson to follow him into the room. “You know I don’t sleep around.”

“I know, I know. But for as long as I have known you, you haven’t shown any interest in anyone. We’re still young Mark, people our age should explore our sexuality. It’s healthy.”

Mark hated lying to Jackson. Which is ironic because at times it feels like he is always lying to him. “There is no one who catches my eye.”

Jackson laid on the bed infront of Mark, bending his arm to rest his head on his palm, “Such high standards.” Jackson grinned.

Mark simply nodded, “Maybe. Or maybe I’m just afraid of catching STDs, unlike you of course.” He hit Jackson’s head lightly with a pillow. 

Jackson widened his eyes in mock horror, “Excuse me? I’ll have you know that I’m clean. So were all my partners.”

“Right.” Mark smiled affectionately. 

“Speaking of partners,” Jackson continued, “I actually came over for a reason. I was hoping that maybe we could meet Dahee today. At the arcade.”

Mark’s smile fell instantly. He wasn’t stupid, he could put two and two together, “Dahee is the girl you’ve been seeing.”

“Yup!” Jackson clearly didn’t notice the drop on Mark’s face, “She’s great. She’s sporty, funny, pretty, literally the whole package. You’ll love her.”

_‘I doubt it._ ’ 

Mark always tried to avoid Jackson’s girlfriends. He didn’t want to risk his feelings getting the best of him and doing something he regretted, so he preferred to not be involved in such encounters. “Why do you want me to meet her?”

“Well, I usually never make you guys hang out with my girlfriends, but maybe that’s the mistake. Maybe if you guys have a strong bond with her, then our relationship will have a strong foundation.”

Mark hated every bit of this conversation. “So it’ll just be you, me and her?”

“Yeah.”

He scrambled to think of an excuse to get out of this. “Why not call all the guys, that way we can all meet her.”

“I thought of that, but she might be uncomfortable with meeting 5 new guys at the same time and I dont want her to feel overwhelmed or intimidated in any way. And you’re... you, so I just know she’ll be comfortable and love you as much as I do.”

Mark took a deep breathe and leaned back on the bed’s headboard, heartbroken and insulted at the same time at Jackson’s words, “You think she’ll be the most comfortable with me because I’m gay?” Any remaining trace of friendliness gone from Mark’s voice. 

Jackson immediately sat up, “What? No! Of course not.” He tried to reach out to hold Mark’s hand.

He pushed Jackson’s hand away, “Then what do you mean by ‘You’re you so she’ll be comfortable’?”

Jackson clearly hurt by Mark rejecting his physical affection. “You know I didn’t mean it like that. I would never say something like that. What I meant was that you’re my best friend. You’re the most important person in my life, and you’re the best person I know. So there is just no way that she wouldn’t like you, because everyone likes you. That’s what I meant.”

Mark’s hands gripped the sheets. His emotions lying somewhere between guilt, jealousy and love. Guilt at how he assumed that Jackson meant the worst, when he knows that Jackson is the most loving person. Jealousy at how Jackson was already looking out for his new girlfriend, thinking about how she would fit in with their tight knit group of friends. And love was just always present when it was about Jackson, and Mark has a feeling that it always will be. 

“No, I’m sorry. I know you’re not like that, I don’t know why I accused you like that.”

‘ _It’s because it feels like everything is becoming about her._ ’

“It’s okay.” Jackson smiled and once again reached out his hand to hold Mark’s. This time Mark reciprocated and let the other give his hand a squeeze. 

“You know I love you right?” Jackson continued.

Mark smiled sadly, “I love you too.”

The two ‘I love you’s were different. But it doesn’t matter, Mark will gladly take it. 

  
  


The arcade was usually a place that Mark loved. It served as an escape for the student whenever he was homesick or frustrated with the amount of workload he had.

But in this moment, right now,Mark hated the arcade with all he had. The loud sounds and bright neon lights everywhere made his head hurt. But nonetheless, with a heavy heart and a splitting headache, he followed Jackson deeper into the establishment.

“Babe!” Jackson called out.

A pretty girl who was standing in front of the basketball hoop game turned around with a ball in her hand and smiled brightly at the duo. She shot it into the hoop as Jackson rushed to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, “Nice shot.” He kissed her cheek.

Mark watched the couple as he begrudgingly moved closer. Not understanding why he agreed to be in this situation in the first place. But he had never been able to say no to Jackson.

‘ _They look good together._ ’ He thought sadly as he bit down on his bottom lip.

Dahee pushed Jackson off her playfully and turned to Mark, “You must be Mark! Jackson has told me so much about you!” She said excitedly. 

Mark couldn’t find it in him to match her friendly tone, settling for a forced smile. 

She clearly noticed Mark’s hesitance and look at Jackson nervously, but the boy was oblivious and just gave her a peck on the lips and pulled her closer, “Let’s play some games and then grab a bite to eat, yeah?”

The next hour was everything Mark feared. Jackson was the perfect boyfriend, and Mark hated it. He hated how Jackson would purposely lose at air hockey when he played against her. He hated how Jackson would steal little kisses from her lips every 15 minutes. He hated how it was so obvious that she was the only one Jackson had his heart set on, the center of his attention. He hated knowing that he will never be that to the other boy. But what he hated the most was that he couldn’t bring himself to hate Dahee. 

Dahee had been so charming and friendly, clearly trying her best to make Mark like her. Agreeing enthusiastically with every game Mark wanted to play and ignoring Jackson’s pleas to have another round of bumping cars. 

“I’m hungryyy.” Jackson pouted and he nuzzled into Dahee, “Let’s get some burgers.”

“What do you want to eat Mark?” She asked instead.

Mark was less hungry and more tired of the constant state of heartache he was in. Trying to avoid looking at the love of his life cuddled up to his girlfriend, he looked down into his phone and shrugged, “I’m not really hungry.”

“Let’s just go back to my place then babe, I’m so hungry, I might as well eat you up.” Jackson whispered sultrilybut loud enough for Mark to hear, as he laid soft kisses on Dahee’s neck.

“Jacksonnn, not here.” But she didn’t push him away.

“That’s why I’m saying that we should go to my place babe.”

“Fuck.” Mark let out, “You guys should go ahead, I have to go checkout a place anyway. I’ll see you later.”

Jackson raised his head from Dahee’s neck and look at Mark somewhat guiltily, “I’m sorry dude, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable-“

“No you didn’t.” Mark put his phone in his pocket, “I really have to go, so you guys should go ahead.”

With just that, he turned around and left the arcade, refusing to turn back and look at the couple. It already hurt too much. Stepping out of the door he saw how the orange rays of the setting sun made the whole street look melancholic so he didn’t feel too bad as the tears ran down his face.

‘ _I just want it to stop hurting_.’

-

** From: You **

** To: Jinyoungie **

** Where is Jaebeom’s record store exactly? **

-

Mark opened the door of the small record store. He noticed that there were no customers as he looked over at the dark walls and black decor of the place, a complete opposite of the arcade he had been in 10 minutes ago. A slow song he didn’t recognize played in the background as he moved his gaze along the CDs and records that were stacked up along the walls. Liking how the lazy and dull atmosphere tricked his mind into calming down a little.

‘ _Jackson would hate his place._ ’

Mark shook his head , trying to get rid of Jackson’s presence in his thoughts. It didn’t work. It never does. 

“Mark.” Jaebeom came out from the adjoining room, “You actually came.”

Mark raised his eyebrow and pulled out a CD from the messy collection next to him, “Well, you invited me, remember?”

Jaebeom chuckled, as he made his way closer, “Of course I remember, you just seemed so unsure in the cafe that day, that I’m just a little surprised you’re here.”

“But I’m glad you’re here. Really glad.” He continued with a sincere smile. 

“You have a nice smile, I remember thinking that the last time too.”

“Oh yeah? You seem a little different from the last time I saw you though.” Jaebeom took the CD out of Mark’s hands, “The Script, huh? Kind of mainstream, but they’ve had a couple good songs.”

“How am I different?”

“Well, your eyes are red this time.”

Mark suddenly felt self conscious. He folded his arms infront of his chest and tried to push back his thoughts about why he was crying in the first place.

“Bad day?” Jaebeom asked.

“I guess you could say that.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

Jaebeom nodded understandingly and made his way to the worn out sofa in the other side the room, “Wanna get some food?”

“Yeah, burgers.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked the chapter! I really like Jaebeom’s character in this fic >.<
> 
> Feel free to reach out to me on Twitter! @markeumyword


	3. Can’t Help Who You Fall For

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry I took so long to update! But i hope you guys enjoy this chapter!!

Jackson was sweaty and tired by the time he got to Bambam’s apartment that Friday evening.

“Why are you so sweaty?” Youngjae grimaced as he opened the front door for him.

“I came straight from practice,” Jackson replied as he entered the apartment and set his fencing bag on the floor beside the door, “It went on for longer than I expected, so I came straight over, didn’t want to be late for movie night~” Jackson laughed as Youngjae dodged his hugs.

“I’m actually surprised you made it, it feels like forever since we’ve seen your face.” Jinyoung interjected.

“That’s not true.” Jackson pouted playfully as he sat down on the couch next to Jinyoung.

“You’re always with that new girlfriend of yours.” Yugyeom added.

“Oh yeah, I heard you made Mark hyung meet her last week?” Bambam asked from where he was settled on the floor in front of the TV.

“Yeah..” Jackson hesitated, remembering how Mark left so abruptly that evening, probably a result of how uncomfortable Jackson made him.

Jinyoung eyed him, but didn’t press it any further.

“So which movie do you guys wanna see tonight?” Yugyeom asked as he looked over Bambam’s collection, “We have Zodiac, Inception, Silence of the Lambs, Bird-“

“Wait, aren’t we waiting for Mark?” Jackson questioned.

“He isn’t coming. He’s busy.” Bambam said, stealing some popcorn from the bowl in Youngjae’s lap.

“Wha-“

“Oh is he with Jaebeom hyung?” Yugyeom asked, his attention still on the collection of movies.

Jinyoung raised his eyebrow, “You know him?”

“Not really. But I’ve seen him around campus before. And a few days ago I came across this little record store downtown, I think Jaebeom hyung works there? Anyway, I think Mark hyung was visiting him that day, since he was chilling with him behind the counter. They seemed pretty close.” Yugyeom answered nonchalantly, still looking over the movies, “Oh! Do you guys want to watch Gravity?”

“No, not that one, I’ve heard its boring.” Youngjae groaned.

“Wait who’s Jaebeom?” Jackson asked, genuinely curious and a bit offended that Mark hadn’t told him about this ‘Jaebeom’ guy he was apparently so close to.

“He’s a senior of mine in the Economics department.” Jinyoung answered.

“So how does Mark know him?”

“We bumped into him in the cafe downstairs a few weeks ago. Mark was having a pretty bad day, but despite that, they got along pretty well. Guess they got in touch with each other after that.”

“Mark hyung did look like he enjoyed the company. He was constantly smiling and laughing at something Jaebeom hyung was saying, he barely even noticed me at first, I had to interrupt their conversation to get his attention.”

Jackson slumped down on the couch, biting the inside of this cheek. He didn’t like the sound of this guy. They had met for the first time a few weeks ago, and Mark was already so close him?

“That doesn’t sound like Mark.”

“What do you mean?” Youngjae asked.

“Think about it Jae,” Jackson started, “Mark is such an introvert, he always has been. Isn’t it kind of odd for him to become so close to some random guy this soon?”

“First of all,” Jinyoung started, “Jaebeom hyung isn’t a ‘random guy’. And secondly, are you genuinely upset about Mark making a new friend?”

“No!” Jackson exclaimed. Jinyoung looked at him in disbelief.

“I’m really not! But as his best friend, I’m just concerned for his safety. We don’t really know Jaebeom”

“Okay Mr. Best Friend, do you want to watch Gravity or not?” Yugyeom asked.

“I told you that it was boring, didn’t I?” Youngjae whined.

Jackson got up from the couch and started towards the door, “I don’t think I’ll stay tonight you guys, I’ll see you later.” Jackson said as he opened the door and left.

“Wait what just happened?” Yugyeom asked, confused.

“He left his training bag.” Bambam mumbled through the popcorn in his mouth.

“So what are you running away from?” Jaebeom asked from the dusty couch in the back of the record store.

Mark looked at the other from where he was sitting on the cash register counter, swinging his legs like a child, “What do you mean?”

“Mark, do I look like a fool?” Jaebeom grinned, “You’ve been coming into the store almost every other day. And I love the company of such a pretty boy, trust me, I do. But I could do without the constant loop of gloomy and sad songs that you insist on playing, most of which are about unrequited love. So just tell me what you’re running away from, or rather, who?” Jaebeom’s sharp, intelligent eyes zeroed in on Mark. 

Mark felt self conscious under his eyes. Knowing that Jaebeom saw right through him. And its not like Mark was trying to hide anything, but he certainly wasn’t expecting to be questioned about his affections in such a straightforward manner. 

“I-“ He hesitated. 

“You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to. But just know that I’m here to listen.” Jaebeom continued. 

His words help spread relief through Mark’s veins. He decided to gather up his courage and let his friend know about his inner turmoil. 

“Do you know Jackson Wang?”

“Jackson Wang?” Jaebeom looked away from Mark and thought out loud, “I don’t think I have, is he the guy you think of while listening to sappy Taylor swift songs?” Jaebeom walked over to Mark.

“You aren’t supposed to tease me..” Mark pouted.

“Okay, I’m sorry I won’t,” Jaebeom laughed, “Tell me more about Wang.”

“There isn’t much to say really, “ Mark looked at his feet, “He’s my best friend.”

“You’re in love with your best friend?”

Mark nodded, “Bad idea, yeah I know. And he’s straight, so its pointless really.”

Jaebeom hummed, letting Mark know he was listening.

“And he recently started dating this girl, and he really likes her. Why wouldn’t he, she’s beautiful, bright, kind, funny, everything he is. They’re basically a perfect match.” Mark’s frustration becoming obvious.

Jaebeom wrapped an arm around him and patted his arm sympathetically.

Mark took a deep breath before continuing, “So I’ve been trying to keep some distance from him, until I can collect my thoughts and feelings, or at least pretending like I have.”

“I don’t know much about your friendship with Jackson, but this situation sucks and I’m sorry you’re going this.”

“If only I hadn’t been such the fool who fell in love with his best friend.” Mark leaned into Jaebeom’s hold

“You can’t help who you love.” Jaebeom said softly.

Jaebeom stopped the bike in front of Mark’s apartment building. Mark unwrapped his arms from his waist and got off from behind him.

“Thanks, I appreciate the ride.” He smiled as he returned the helmet he was wearing.

“Yeah, no problem,” Jaebeom reciprocated the smile. His eyes drifted to the building, “Um, is that boy, who’s glaring at us from his balcony, a neighbor?” 

Mark followed Jaebeom’s line of sight. And there Jackson was, glaring at the pair from Mark’s balcony.

“No.” Mark answered, looking at Jackson with confusion, “That’s Jackson. And it’s my apartment balcony.”

“Ohh,” Jaebeom’s eyes widened a little with surprise as he looked at Mark, “Maybe there is more to this story than you thought, pretty boy.”

“Don’t call me that.” Mark punched Jaebeom’s arm playfully, “And trust me, there isn’t, he does this more often that you’d think.”

“He’s always just in your house, waiting for you to come home? Right, that’s totally normal friend behavior.”

“Shut up Jaebeom.” Mark rolled his eyes. “I was going to invite you upstairs, but now,” he looked over at Jackson still standing there, staring right at them. “Maybe next time?”

Jaebeom grinned and lifted himself off the seat of the motorbike a bit to lean forward and press a light kiss on Mark’s cheek. “Good night, pretty boy.” He whispered in the boy’s ear.

“What- why would you do that?” Mark flustered, painfully aware of Jacksons gaze burning the back of his head.

Jaebeom laughed and started the engine of his bike, “Just wanted to test something. Let me know how your conversation with him goes.”

Mark watched his figure retreat into the distance for a minute. Using that minute to mentally prepare himself for whatever Jackson was about to throw at him. Turning back towards his apartment just in time to catch Jackson walking back into the house.

The door flung open before Mark could even reach out for the handle, a glowering Jackson’s standing there. 

“You’re in my apartment again?” He accused as he entered the apartment, closing the door behind him.

“Where were you?”

“You know I can have you arrested for trespassing if you keep doing this right?”

“Who was that guy?”

“What are you even doing here?” Mark asked as he walked towards to kitchen.

“Mark!” Jackson followed him, “Answer me.”

“Why do I feel like I’m being interrogated?”

Jackson groaned with frustration, “Mark, just tell me where you were.”

“At a record store downtown.”

“So you blew off a tradition with your best friends, to hang out at a record store?”

“Is that what this is all about? Me missing movie night?” Mark asked, a sarcastic laugh in his voice, as he poured the instant coffee packet into a cup of milk.

“No. This is about you putting random people before your own friends.”

Mark stopped stirring the coffee and look at Jackson with disbelief, “Putting random people before my own friends? You’re going to teach me about prioritizing? You? The boy who has not only blown off your precious movie night atleast a 100 times, but a bunch of other things, because you were always too busy being with your weekly new girl, who you say is the love of your life. Only to break up with her two weeks later.”

Mark and Jackson kept their eyes locked on each other.

“Don’t turn this on me Mark.”

“Why? Don’t like hearing the truth about your playboy tendencies?”

“Look, I know I’ve fucked up in the past.” Jackson started softly, “I know I have. But... but its just unlike you.”

This just made Mark angrier. “It’s not  like  me to go out with a new friend? What does that even mean Jackson?”

“He didn’t look like just a friend.” Jackson muttered under his breath.

“What was that?” Mark pried.

“I said, it didn’t look like he was just a ‘friend’ when he kissed you after dropping you off from your date.” Jackson bit back, his voice full of spite.

Mark stared at the boy, lost for wards. Jackson has always been excited and loud but never aggressive. This is the first time since Mark had known him, that Jackson reacted like this. And over what? Jaebeom?

“Jaebeom is just a friend Gaga, it wasn’t a date. And he didn’t kiss me. He pecked my cheek. But even if it was a date? Why do you care? Aren’t you always telling me to ‘explore sexually’?” Mark replied.

Jackson walked closer to Mark, invading his personal space and grabbed his arm, turning the smaller boy around, to face him, “Don’t lie to me Yien, he isn’t just a friend.”

Mark felt small under Jackson’s accusatory gaze. And even though he hadn’t done anything wrong, he felt like he had just committed the worst sin. He hated how much power Jackson had over him.

Mark shook his arm out of Jackson’s grip and pushed him. “What wrong with you today?”

“Me? You’re the one acting out of character Mark!”

Mark glared at him, “Why? Because I went out?”

“So this is a romantic thing?”

Mark sighed. “Go home Jackson. I don’t want to deal with this right now.”

“I’m just worried about you Mark. I didn’t like the look of that guy.”

“Jackson do you hear yourself? Did you and your new girlfriend fight or something? What’s with you today? You’re usually so accepting and open when you meet new people. But you already don’t like Jaebeom? Even though you don’t know him?”

Jackson stopped in his tracks. Mark was right. He is never like this. He’s always the first one to introduce himself to new people and hope to be their friends, so why does this Jaebeom guy bother him so much? Why was he so angry about this?

He took a step back from Mark as he tried to think.

“Go Gaga. We’ll talk about this tomorrow.”

“I-” Jackson started, but stopped, unsure of what he wanted to say. “Um, yeah.”

Mark watched the boy he loves turn his back on him and make his way for the door.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jackson turned around and asked, his eyes looked almost afraid, like he was scared that Mark would refuse to see him again.

“See you tomorrow.” Mark promised.

Mark’s phone pinged just as Jackson left the apartment.

-

**From: Jaebeom**

**To: You**

**Did he get jealous?**

-

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! Do leave a comment and let me know what you think! It really helps motivate me! 
> 
> Come yell at me about updates on Twitter! @markeumyword


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